Writing Prompt - The Rant

The prompt instructed to write the rant twice - once from the point of view of the ranter and then from the point of view of the person/thing being ranted about. If you've lived in Bozeman for a while, you'll be familiar with this rant.

The Rant - All Those People Moving to Bozeman and Ruining It

When I think of all those people moving in and ruining Bozeman I get so mad. And let me tell you, Bozeman is now ruined. 

So many ills brought upon our sweet little town: traffic, no parking, long waits at restaurants, endless development, crowded trailheads, the list goes on and on. When will it stop?

I can't believe all of the greed. Developers build on every last open acre of land. Mid-rises, townhouses, trophy homes, condos, it's a mess.  Investors buy up blocks of downtown and turn the houses into vacation rentals. Rich people buy property and use it two weeks of the year. Prices skyrocket, taxes go up, locals can no longer afford to live here.

All those people lived somewhere else but they left because it was ruined and now they come here, bring their ways with them, and want Bozeman to be exactly like the place they left. That's how a place gets ruined.

The list of people ruining Bozeman is long - people from the coasts, rich retirees, flat-brim trucker hat doofuses, trust funders, developers, hipsters from the city, mid-life crisisers, people who were born here, moved away and then moved back. 

I hate all of those people.

Retelling the Story. Point-of-View = Person Moving to Bozeman

I'm so stoked. Graduate degree in hand, telecommuting job with a Silicon Valley start-up, six-figure salary, quarterly bonuses. It made the six years of my Ph.D. program worth it. Now it's time to do what I want to do, live where I want to live.

No more California. The crowds, the traffic, no parking. Here's what I want: a town under 75,000 people, cultural happenings and good restaurants, outdoor activities nearby. Bozeman is perfect. And I can buy a house for less that $1M. I am so there. I just signed a lease on a basement apartment in the Northeast Neighborhood (Only $1,100/month and no roommates!), and I move in a week from today.

To treat myself and get ready for the move I do a web search to see what folks in Bozeman are wearing. I find Revolvr, a cool men's clothing store. Casual but stylish. So I buy a flat brim trucker hat, six flannel shirts, a ski hat with a pompom, and three pairs of jeans.

What kinds of cars to people in Bozeman drive? Subarus and Sprinter Vans are popular so I put in a call to the dealers and buy one of each. Can you say #VanLife?

I've made a lot of sacrifices to get to where I am today. My Ph.D. program was tough. Six years of hell not to mention all of the schooling that came before that. My 30th birthday is just a few months off, and I am tired of being a poor, broke student. I want to be the new me and that's not going to happen if I say in California.

Bozeman, Montana, here I come.

~

Want to read more on changes in Bozeman? Here are a few posts:

• Paradise Ruined: http://annvinciguerra.blogspot.com/2017/01/paradise-ruined.html
• Bozeman Alley Tour: http://annvinciguerra.blogspot.com/2017/07/bozeman-alley-tour.html
• Bozeman Graffiti Wars: http://annvinciguerra.blogspot.com/2017/10/bozeman-graffiti-wars.html
• Bozeman's Mid-Town: https://annvinciguerra.blogspot.com/2017/09/bozeman-touring-midtown.html